An Introduction and a Conclusion

Hello! Nice to meet you. I'm Mrs Loquacious, and I'm a wife, a mommy, a homeschooler, and a part-time business owner of an educational clinic.

It has been two months since I blogged.  I used to blog daily, because I was at home with a baby who was allergic to sleep, and I desperately craved intellectual stimulation, even if it was just in the form of writing complex sentences on a blog.

You see, following my grand entrance into motherhood, I somehow lost my identity, because being a parent (and keeping an infant alive) became the overwhelming priority over other aspects of my being.  It was a truly confusing, hormonally-driven time of zombie-walking in a proverbial sleepless desert.  Thank God for social media and nap times, and the wonderful part-time nannies and cleaning services who helped support us during the darkest hours and days.

Since then, it has taken several years (yes, YEARS) for me to feel entirely myself again.  I think I've recovered most of the shards of my identity, although it seems that the pieces are fitting together quite differently now.  I mean, I used to be a teacher, and I thought I was a pretty good one, at that.  Now, in hindsight, I question that.  Having a kid informs you on learning; it is a great education on how to educate.  It is a bit ironic, then, that while I'm probably a better teacher now than I used to be, my desire to teach has dwindled significantly.

Anyway, so I'm a teacher who doesn't want to teach anymore.  Instead, I help support learners by helping to maximize their learning potential through cognitive exercises.  It's still a part-time gig at the moment, but I'm anticipating growth in the coming year.

Since I'm also homeschooling my neurodiverse little smartypants, my plate feels full.  Teaching your own kid is not the same as managing a classroom full of children, by the way.  It is both easier and harder, but ultimately a million times more rewarding.  I'm thankful to have this outlet to channel my inner teaching impulses, while spending more time with Little L.

But between wearing these hats and adulting (bills, laundry, that kind of stuff), I don't have a ton of time left over to write. Truth be told, I also lack inspiration these days, because I'm not mindlessly boob-feeding an infant for hours at a time. My brain is constantly racing from one thing to another, and seriously, sometimes it is nothing short of a miracle for me to even remember to renew my car insurance before it runs out. It's embarrassing how often I do forget to put the wet laundry in the dryer, though.

So I am sorry, because I wanted to keep the dream alive, and have this blog as a thriving cathartic place for me to keep on venting and oversharing. Instead, it is another nearly-abandoned corner of the Web collecting figurative dust while its author moves on to busy "real-life" things.

I've contemplated shutting this all down, but somehow that also seems like a disservice to the many hours I've poured into my posts in years past. Maybe there are truth suggest to be gleaned, still. Maybe it serves as a kind of inukshuk to welcome and guide new parents, or a form of memory stone for me to remember through the haze of the past 6 years. I'm not sure why, but I still feel like this blog needs to exist.

So here we are. Welcome, and it's nice to meet you again. I'm afraid I can't stay and chat, but you are more than welcome to linger about. Maybe I will pop in from time to time. I'm glad you were here, and I'm glad I was here, too. :)